Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Not knowing what to do with yourself at 5 in the morning sucks... This is why I hate exam time! My entire cycle goes Topsy-turvy! I go to sleep at 6 in the morning and wake up somewhere around 4. Which is cool, given my obsession with vampires, but I bet vampires don't get anxiety attacks due to exams, and don't read such dreadfully boring stuff like Oroonoko! Aphra Behn! If you were alive I'd make a gujju behn out of you( I don't know why thats relevant, I'm just bored) and kill you! BLOOODY!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Dear Moomoo
I often have very weird realizations, and by realizations I do not mean that these things that I realize have previously been unknown to me. Its just that sometimes the enormity of it just hits me in the face... with a resounding THWACK! SO this is what hit me today... that you really do love me so much. I cant tell you what it feels like to suddenly realize that there is someone out there who looks out for you, looks up to you and turns to you to share her problems, her secret pleasures... her life. I love you so much! Thank you... for everything... =)
Long time no see...
Dear Blog,
I haven't seen you for quite some time! Missed me? Well I didn't miss you, in fact I was trying to bubble wrap your existence and shove it deep inside me like I do with so many other things that I don't want to face, because you remind me of things, relationships... that are dead. God knows I've wanted to write... very badly at times... but then I remembered accusations and stayed away from you. But everyone needs to move on, or least create the illusion of moving on... hence I have come to acknowledge your presence... because frankly dear... I don't care any longer what anyone thinks of my blogs.
I haven't mourned for something that was a big part of my life. One night... that's all I allowed myself. One night of hysterical crying, breathing problems and anxiety attacks. One night. The next morning I looked at myself in the mirror and vowed that I wont shed another tear for someone who doesn't deserve it. But I held myself back from blogging because those accusations were still swirling in my head. Well... today I truly free myself from those bonds.
You wont hold me back. Not any longer. I've suffered enough for you.
I haven't seen you for quite some time! Missed me? Well I didn't miss you, in fact I was trying to bubble wrap your existence and shove it deep inside me like I do with so many other things that I don't want to face, because you remind me of things, relationships... that are dead. God knows I've wanted to write... very badly at times... but then I remembered accusations and stayed away from you. But everyone needs to move on, or least create the illusion of moving on... hence I have come to acknowledge your presence... because frankly dear... I don't care any longer what anyone thinks of my blogs.
I haven't mourned for something that was a big part of my life. One night... that's all I allowed myself. One night of hysterical crying, breathing problems and anxiety attacks. One night. The next morning I looked at myself in the mirror and vowed that I wont shed another tear for someone who doesn't deserve it. But I held myself back from blogging because those accusations were still swirling in my head. Well... today I truly free myself from those bonds.
You wont hold me back. Not any longer. I've suffered enough for you.
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